azmeshuggah

I go back home soon. This is gonna be short cause all you need to know is that everything in my life is going great. I am very happy with Jarelle. The first night back is going to be so much fun. I love her and once the comp is gone I have won the bet. YAY. That will make the night a little more passionate. Well yeah. I made 6 CD's for us to listen too. AAAAAAHHHHHHH 4 days. I love you baby. MWA. See you soon.
Your fiance,
Mike Sullivan

So yeah...I am so tired. I really want to wait for J to get back from work. I am so sorry hunnie. If i wake up I will talk to you. But I am so tired. MWA...I love you so much baby. think of when I get back to AZ...AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I am so excited. You are the most beautiful girl in the world. I promise I love you more than anything. Talk to you tomorrow baby. Call me while you are ditching church k baby. MWA!!! Bye sweetie. Dream of me. you are in my dreams...you always are. hehe youare my lover. aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh need to sleep. k, love you baby.

I am so tired...and all I want is Jarelle to call. I never go to sleep without talking to her. I wish she would hurry. See this is why I get worried. I don't have a prob with Jarelles friends. Even though Rachel says some messed up things about me and Tessa is going out with Ryan Brady. By the way, Tessa wants to go on a double date. hahahaha yeah fucking right. I would rather go and hang out with a nigger. I will never hang out and be nice to that fuck. I would totally kill him. I hope Jarelle keeps that promise about him. I really hate that kid. I DLed a bunch of old Metallica. It is just nasty. Oh I wrote my last english paper. I ended up with a B in that class. It was ok. I have eight days till I come back to AZ. I can't wait to see Jarelle. oh and she started so it is going to be an awesome first night ;-) yeah so I am so tired...just tired of a lot of things. My stomach hurts. I lost two games in FIFA. I can't believe it. How come all my days are feeling so low. Like I just am not feeling the same. i feel sad all the time. i should be happy. I will even ask Jarelle to cheer me up and at times the effort just seems lame. I do love her though. She is so cute. I wish she would freakin call. I am starting to get mad about this shit. I have been waiting all night. I really don't get why she knows I wait for her and still stays out all night like I am not here...whatever I called twice and she isn'teven returning it. I am going to lay down. please call me. ugh...

k, I don't know what Rita has to benifit by saying that she has had sex with me but there is one thing I do know...I never put my high class shit into that disgusting whore. Dude, and what really gets me mad is that Jarelle lied to me yesterday. She told me nothing happened that would get me angry. Well this gets me fucking angry doesn't it. And why does it get me angry? I am sick of hearing it. that is one. Who the fuck were you talking to yesterday that told you that? I thought you told me you wouldn't talk to him...mother fucker. I hate when you don't tell me the truth Jarelle. When I ask you if anything happened and I know it was either Ben or Brandon...OMG. I am so fucking mad right now. I wish I never read your website. Jarelle you will know what happened with the Rita thing. I TOLD YOU WHAT FUCING HAPPENED. So stop writing you will never know. Cause you do know. You know I am not lying to you. But now how can i trust what you tell me about what happens at school. You are still talking to them huh. That is nice. Well guess what you can fucking call me if you want to...I am so mad at you. Yesterday John fucking interupts us. Well now I find out that fuckin Ben and fuck ass are still telling you shit. No wonder he wanted to take you to prom Jarelle...you still fucking are friends with them. Well I know I have parts of this story wrong. But after you are done with school we are going to fucking talk. And you are going to tell me the TRUTH about yesterday. and after that. You are going to stop even saying hi to these kids. and that goes for Justin and all of their friends. I hope you see how that is only fair. This is another thing you should have done long ago huh. But you fucking didn't. Whatever. Talk to you fucking later...still love you.

AAAAAHHHHHHHH k, Jarelle makes me so happy. I was at Chilli's today and she called and made sure to tell me not to worry. I love her. oh, and what i typed earlier. i decided not to be mad before I asked J what happened. Well she explained it. I really don't like Rachel. But I am not holding it against her. Nothing can stop Jarelle and I and I know that nothin happened. And Jarelle better know that I am telling her the truth. Well, I can't believe I have to wait an extra hour for Jarelle today. Hunnie, you really have to stop doing what you are doing.

yay for tutors!!! That is all i have to say for now...

So yesterday leads me into today. Last night J was mad at me for not calling her all day. I totally understand her complaint. Like I am always making her feel like the princess on AZ and yesterday i knida messed up. And I know she worries when i don't give her alot of attention. Like I am the same way with her. But I do feel bad. Yesterday my princess felt a little lower on the chain and that is really shitty for her. I would give J the world but the problem is we are almost out of mins. I don't want to run out cause then when the comp goes away we can't talk...but then in class today i remebered something. See I can run out of mins and I can't get them back. Jarelle is almost out of mins but what happens at the begining of each month. AAAAAHHHHHHHH she gets more mins. 1,000 mins will come back to her on the 1st right. YAY so that means we use the mins she has and she has 1,000 new mins for those 4 days the comp is gone. AAAAAAAHHHHHHH I am so happy. No matter what happens it always works out for us. We are totally meant to be. That is a good feeling. So I just tried to call her. She was in class. I need to make things better. Yesterday i made her feel really bad...I am SO SORRY HUNNIE!!! She is going to call me at lunch. I am glad too cause I am so bored. I got my exams switched and I am already to go to Raleigh on Thursday the 6th. The whole 30 hours in an airport isn't too cool though. I am going to not do shit the whole time. Wow...I feel so bad about yesterday. I seriously didn't know the phone was unplugged. Wow. k, I hope she forgives me. she wrote this in her away today "i'm such a sucker for a sweet talker." I am not too sure what that means. It obviously better be about me. If it is about somebody else I will be pissed. But I am possitive it is about me. She doesn't talk to other guys on the phone and why would a girl talk sweet to her. That is just gross. So it has to be about me or else something is fishy. Well yeah...
Yesterday i wanted to write about how I felt about leaving High Point. People here are like we will miss you man. I am like how? I am a grouch who just calls people Jew and fuckers. What would anyone miss about me? They are like we will miss hearing you insult people. It is so funny. I am like that is nice. I won't miss you. And they laugh. THey don't hear it in my voice but I seriously mean it. Do any of them think I was happy here. NO of course not. I am happy in AZ with my gf, Dante, family, Dogs, and life to be. I never wanted to be at this school. Not since the time I signed here. The last night I was with J and I realized that I would miss her more than anything. I cried all night...granted that night we drank. That was so stupid of us. Never like that again. We could have just went out ourselves and had so much fun without booze. BUt yeah, like right then it hit me. I am going to leave my baby for almost a year. She had just come back from New York and I was leaving her. That is so horrible of me. I took my best friends and left them stranded. Sorry guys. When I get back i owe some time to Jarelle and my friends. Sorry guys you kinda go barely in second here. hahahaha obvious reasons that all best friends understand. Remember durring the day on the eighth DANTE returns. It will be amazing. I am so excited. Like it is what 11 days away. I think I will cry when I see Jarelle. Happy tears of course but crying none the less. I love you all.

P.S. Hunnie, please forgive me. You are my princess. I am kinda the beggar who drools when you walk by...I am sorry for yesterday. I love you!!!! *MWA* (hug) [make out] {um...not going to type this one}hahahaha

Well Kyle is having problems with shyness. Dude speaking from experience it is hard to ask a girl you like if she wants to be with you. But man I am so happy with Jarelle. i have fallen in love deeply and it all happens cause i took the chance. Had I never asked this girl out I might be alone and unhappy. How terrible would that be. So ask and if she is truely your friend she won't care that you like her. you will still be friends. Muggy asked Shawna out and they are still good friends. And I know Muggs still cares about Shawna but the point is that they still are friends.
k, I just finsihed an eight page paper and yes it is good. yeah I have to go real fast. Update later.

Well I made a bet today with J. It could be the hardest but coolest bet I ever made. I can't beat off for the rest of my time in Carolina. But Jarelle assures me that it will be worth it. If I do lose then we will still have fun. I really just want to see her but no funny stuff. hahahahaha well I love this girl. She is the only one in the world who could get me to stop doing that. Jeeze...I will win this bet. It is going to be so worth it.
I am waiting for her to get off work. I think I am more obsessed with Jarelle than that crazy Amiee was for me hahaha. I just care so much about my baby. I never want her to get hurt or feel bad. I know I tend to do that to her but I never mean it. I miss AZ. When I get back I promise Sai and Kyle I will stop in for a little. But the night is truely for J. SOrry guys. Jarelle and I have gone without eachother for almost 5 months. That is so long not to see a loved one. Actually I hate seeing family j/k.
I promise Jarelle that I won't cheat this bet. I know i will win though. I never have to masterbate. I just get bored and do it. I will just keep myself occupied with Studying. And the worst part is Jarelle talks dirty to me and it just kills me. I want to do it so bad...she knows it too. I know she wants me to win deep down though. It will just add a little more romance to the first night back. I am going to DINNER AND A MOVIE WITH HER. AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited. That night will be the best night ever. OMG...I can't wait. MWA. Bye baby.

You are the inspiration I need...

She laughs at my dumb jokes when noone does...
She's so smart and independent, I don't think she needs me
Not quite half as much as I know I need her, I wonder why theres not another guy that she'd prefer...
I see her pretty face, it takes me away to a better place
I know that everything, know that everything, know that everything, everythings gonna be fine...

My blood runs red beneath the knife, I'd give me soul to you tonight...

Just a few songs that I thought of J when i heard these parts. All pretty cute things about my baby. By the way hun, you last update is awesome. You manager Andy kinda is inappropriate. But it is fine. I promise I am not mad. He just says things to you that he shouldn't be saying. Anyway...

The big thing lately has come down to a comment that went along the lines of Dean saying I am following the trend by not wanting to drink. hahahahaha so when you didn't want to drink it was ok. Sai, Wils and I didn't force it. But I have made a decision for me. i don't want to fucking do it dude. So if you want to be a little prick about it say something. Don't go behind my back and say shit to Sai and Wils online. What trend am i following. Everybody in college drinks or smokes. I have done it and I feel bad...I have done it went I promised J I wouldn't. And I am sick of following the cheap thrills of alchohl. What fun is it? You don't remember things. You look like white trash when drunk aka RON!!! I am sick of it. And lately you have changed Dean. And don't pretend you haven't. You guys were going to kick Andy out even if he didn't quite. Fuck this Storm kid. You see that. You are following this kid like he has his cock in you ass. I am sick of you being a prick. The last thing you posted on my site was just a dig at me. What you guys know or don't know about Jarelle and I is that I love her. I trusted you guys to keep secrets and not tell people I was going to marry her. But if i had the money I would. Right now. I would ask her to marry me. I love that girl and I will protect her till the day I day. Your last post to me was an indirect strike at Jarelle. So you can shove your little sex comment up you fucking ass man. You have fun doing this fucking tour with "Storm". Trust me. All the bullshit that fucking faggot has feed you is a lie. I am not going to support you when you are fucking being selfish. You want people to give you support in something that will surely fail. Worthless...By the way. That comment you made. It was your last comment on my fuckin site till you can grow up. It is your best buddies (Me, Kyle, and Sai) or this boyfriend of yours Storm. You have made your choice. And if you don't think you have then i will help you. Take Storm and enjoy your tour. You can go off on me later. But I won't be talking to you back. Richie quiting the band was a "godsend". Without Richie you guys had no fucking band. You know that. Without Richie there is no Dante, No Dead Fragments, no Akaycia Embers, and there would be no Kill the Last Hour. You guys should be sucking on Richies saggy nutsack. I know I will when i get back. I think you should talk to Richie. His back hurts where he was stabbed.